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The Curse

from Raw Scriptures by T. Karras

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lyrics

It feels like I’ve been cursed
It feels like nobody understands
And it’s a curse that’s weighing me down
Why oh why do I have this condition

It feels like I’ve been cursed
Livin’ with autism really does hurt
It feels like nobody understands
It feels like nobody gives a damn
And it’s a curse that’s weighing me down
I can’t keep myself afloat, feels like I’m gonna drown
Why oh why do I have this condition
It’s like I’m fucked up by my own admission

I’ve been in situations, every day, every night
I survived all the stress, I survived all the fights
And It took a huge toll on my mental health
Just a consequence of tryna learn the rules of hell
They always change, they never remain the same
This world is insane, it leaves me rackin’ my brain
There’s no common good, it’s a free-for-all
They don’t want to share, they want to have it all
How do terrible fuckers get off scot free
And why do they always blame it on me
I get no support, I get no sympathy
Everybody watchin’ like it’s the Truman show on TV
It feels like I’m public enemy number one
Livin’ my life with autism just ain’t no fun
When they expect you to fail right from the start
I’m trynna play my part but they make it so hard

It feels like I’ve been cursed
Livin’ with autism really does hurt
It feels like nobody understands
It feels like nobody gives a damn
And it’s a curse that’s weighing me down
I can’t keep myself afloat, feels like I’m gonna drown
Why oh why do I have this condition
It’s like I’m fucked up by my own admission

I’m a good person at heart but they say I’m bad
Like I'd do shit on purpose to get people mad
I’m so socially inept, I can’t even forget
Why the fuck is this world filled with disrespect
It got me to the point where I just want to cry
And then I get depression and I just want to die
They ain’t practice what they preach, they all want war
Holy fuck people are crazy, I can’t stand them anymore
With their self-entitlement and their hypocriticism
They’ve gotten to a point where they won’t listen
To reason, they don’t think for themselves
They just follow the herd with no souls in their shells
Sometimes I wish I was normal so I wouldn’t have to worry
Sometimes I doubt myself, thinkin’ am I really worthy
Have I truly found myself?, am I really pretendin’
Are you listenin'? Do I have your attention

It feels like I’ve been cursed
Livin’ with autism really does hurt
It feels like nobody understands
It feels like nobody gives a damn
And it’s a curse that’s weighing me down
I can’t keep myself afloat, feels like I’m gonna drown
Why oh why do I have this condition
It’s like I’m fucked up by my own admission

credits

from Raw Scriptures, released September 2, 2021

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T. Karras Eastvale, California

Emcee/musician/creator/autistic.

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